February 2012
1 post
1 tag
Got Skillz?
I had a revelation. Always I ask myself what I could have with what I can do. Now I’ve started asking what I can do with what I have.
It’s a little shift but powerful. Like I like the idea of living in Southeast Asia for awhile. I’d been thinking that we could sublet our house and I have a resume that could get me an entry-level ESL teaching position. But that never feels...
January 2012
11 posts
21 tags
Will They or Won't They?
Why are so many of Hollywood’s beloved wonder couples on the blink? Hard economic times affect us all. It sinks into our lives and absorbs our culture whether rich or poor, celebrity or not. When times are tough, souls are rocked off the foundations. In the land of happily ever after, can our favorites make it?
Photo reblogged from Style Now.
Vanessa Paradis and Johnny Depp
Two...
1 tag
Window Shopping the Next Big Thing
We’re stuck. We’ve never been stuck before. Either he wanted to go to grad school or I wanted to go to Southeast Asia. Never have we been at a loss for what our next big thing would be. But we’re stuck.
Last night I had a dream that there was an apocalypse. People were living indoors. Food and medicine were running low. I knew one place that would still have water, still have...
2 tags
Looking at the Mirror
I hate self-help books. Here’s my interpretation of reading a self-help book.
I am going to tell you this.
Then I’m going to tell you that.
Are you ready for me to tell you this?
I don’t think you are so really look into yourself.
Now are you ready?
Are you sure?
Last chance, because I’m going to tell you now.
We’re all seeking love and acceptance.
I hope...
1 tag
“It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with...”
– Ralph Waldo Emerson (via misswallflower)
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“Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth...”
– Sigmund Freud (via fleshscars)
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Happy 2012
When we are happy we don’t hurt others.
My husband was watching the Black Power Mixtape this week while I was getting ready for work and I caught that line from the voiceover just as I was walking out the door. I’ve been thinking about that ever since.
Maybe happiness doesn’t mean being positive and sneezing rainbows every day. In fact, recently, I’ve been thinking that...
1 tag
“What I admire about Lucille Ball is that she was bold and not afraid to look...”
– Dianna Agron (via littlewishjar)
1 tag
Just Another January
It’s January. I know, mostly from blogging, that I get depressed about this time every year. It ain’t lack of sunshine either. I’ve got plenty. I feel all right this year, though, despite a disastrous Christmas. My mom threw me out of the house because of the essays I sent her last October. She’d disown me if she knew I had this blog …
But I’m here and...
2 tags
Resolution: TO DO More, To Do Less
I have one resolution for 2012 and that is to keep a weekly To Do list. One list is for things that nourish me. The second is for errands. I want to write them both at the start of each week, on Sundays.
This first week of the year, I have yoga, meditation, and massage on my nourishment list. I have listed to set up a credit union account, begin revising the first draft of my novel, and...
December 2011
6 posts
2 tags
To All, A Very Merry Christmas
May your hearts be light and your season bright. May many blessing bring joy to your life today and all through the year. Happy Holidays!
1 tag
Oy!
Just spent 40 minutes digging around in our garage with the flashlight trying to find the menorah but, hey, found it! Along with the Christmas lights from last year that we thought we lost.
Oh Happy Hanukkah Day!
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Husband and Wife Stuff
Husband: I don’t get angry at you very often.
Me: When do you get angry at me?
Husband: I don’t, I guess. Well, I don’t like it when you put things in the trash when it’s already full. You could just take it out. But that’s not really mad, it’s …
Me: Frustrated. Like when you continually put knives in the dishwasher facing up when I tell you not to.
...
1 tag
What Makes Happiness?
My husband works for an heiress. A lot of the strange things that happen in his day come up because she has no concept of what it feels like to need money. She’s a good person, but her whole world is obscured.
Yesterday, I asked him if she’s happy. No. Nope. She’s not happy. No happier than anyone else. As humans, we’re problem solvers, right? If we don’t have...
1 tag
Aborigines, Bones, and the Meaning of Life
Hello!
I’ve been on vacation. And other things, but mainly vacation. Man, do I have a lot of things to say … but there’s a dinner in the oven with the timer about to go. So, I guess I’ll have to be brief.
My husband and I hiked a trail in Costa Rica with one other couple and a guide. Not a single human noise around. Only plants and animals and rain. Lots of rain. We...
November 2011
6 posts
3 tags
Notes on FIRST KISS TO LASTING BLISS
I’ve been following Lori Lowe’s blog Marriage Gems for a couple of years and find her advice on marriage truly wonderful and inspiring. She’s not a marriage counselor, just a marriage student and writer like me, but she has researched lasting marriage and interviewed happily married couples from all walks of life. Now Lori has a new book coming out—First Kiss to Lasting...
1 tag
“If we listened to our intellect we’d never have a love affair. We’d never have a...”
– Ray Bradbury
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Shaking the Family Tree
My mom is mad at me. She’s mad in a way that she might never get over. She doesn’t like to talk things out. She doesn’t like to remember hard times. She doesn’t like it that I’m a writer and she doesn’t like to read what I write. But what’s difficult about that is … I became a writer because I needed to be able to express myself.
Sigh.
...
1 tag
Reflection on 90 Joys
Do you remember why I started tracking 90 joys in 90 days? It was because my husband told me that I shouldn’t always be focused on the next vacation to make me happy, that I should live each day joyfully. He started his full time job just a few weeks ago and now all he talks about is needing a vacation. Aw, humble pie. It’s nice to be able to serve up a big dish of it sometimes...
1 tag
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 82-90
Day 82: I saw George Clooney. I really did! I went to a special screening of the Ides of March and he walked right past me. So much smaller—both shorter and thinner—in person but still charmed the pants off the audience despite being seemingly quite nervous.
Day 83: I met with the producer who loved my screenplay and she told me to start looking for an agent. (This is the...
October 2011
21 posts
1 tag
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 81
Day 81: I realized that I looked pretty with no makeup on and my hair unbrushed. My face was relaxed. I wasn’t stressed. That made all the difference.
2 tags
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 80
Day 80: CoverGirl Liquiline Blast Eyeliner. I just bought it tonight and I’m already in love with the stuff! It seriously goes on as smooth as a liquid but in a pencil form. Looks like my mom is going to get three of these in her stocking this Christmas. Of all of my random drugstore buys, this one was a jackpot.
P.S. Nobody pays me to endorse products in case that...
1 tag
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 79
Day 79: I want to give up the joys but I’m not going to. They’ve been good for me and I’m almost there now. Just eleven more days… I’ve been feeling the overwhelming urge to quit everything recently. I think I’m just tired.
1 tag
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 78
Day 78: Downed two glasses of coconut water. I don’t care if it’s 40 calories a glass. I’ll take them. Something about drinking this coconut water (next to the boxed soy milk in the grocery store) is making me feel replenished like nothing else.
1 tag
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 77
Day 77: Ten minutes with cucumbers on my eyes and a peppermint-scented washcloth over my face. It’s the new complimentary service at the day spa I already adore. Pretty amazing. Now I’m looking for peppermint oils on the internet so that I can make them at home.
1 tag
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 76
Day 76: I bought a whole Adele album from iTunes. I don’t do that much—buy music—but that girl. She can sing. I kind of just wanted to give money to that kind of talent, as silly as it sounds.
Her heart was beating through him. →
Norma Yeager, 90, and Gordon Yeager, 94, were married 72 years. They passed away last night while holding hands in the ICU. After Gordon’s heart ceased to beat, he still had a pulse because his wife’s heart was registering on his monitor. It’s what life’s all about, huh?
Read their full story.
1 tag
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 75
Day 75: I didn’t work on my book. My mentor this week said that he admires my work ethic. I do, too. No one can say I’m lazy, that’s for sure. But I’m sort of the opposite of lazy. I’m driven, amped up, and a downright slave master when it comes to the voice I use to talk to myself inside my head. This morning I woke up at 6 a.m. and I didn’t want to work on my...
1 tag
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 74
Day 74: I took charge of my own time. Yes, I did. When people stopped by my desk, I asked them to book time on my calendar to talk. When my husband asked me to review an email before he sent it, I told him I would do it when I got home from work. When a friend told me that I needed to book a flight through the Southwest deal now-now-now before the sale ends, I said I would check later. When I...
1 tag
The Common Cold (Shoulder)
I haven’t kissed my husband in five days. He’s been sick and I am determined not to get it. Through all of the hacking, sneezing, and basic filth of wet tissues, I’ve managed to be lovingly concerned without being loving. Not snuggling. Not cuddling. Not getting-up-and-personal-with-his-tonsils kind of love and he’s a tad bit resentful.
He thinks I’m destined to...
2 tags
90 Days, 90 Joys: Days 65-73 A.K.A. The Best Week...
Sorry I’ve been out of the loop and not writing. It was a BIG week and one where everyday was so exciting that I fell asleep by 8:30 p.m. I swear I have the energy level of a Cocker Spaniel—chasing my tail with gusto or asleep with my tongue hanging out.
Day 65: A producer at a major studio read my screenplay … and loved it.
Day 66: My husband landed his dream job, which...
2 tags
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 64
Day 64: I made one of my favorite summer salads one last time. I use Paula Deen’s recipe for Corn, Avocado, and Tomato Salad but substitute heirloom tomatoes (instead of cherry tomatoes) and add a dash of white wine vinegar. Not the prettiest dish you’ve ever seen but it’s light, crunchy, and full of flavor.
1 tag
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 63
Day 63: I was quiet. My husband and I stayed home all day. We did our own thing. We didn’t talk much but it was good. I think because we’re introverts, sometimes we need time to catch up on the quiet. Some weeks I feel like my mouth has moved faster than my brain and it makes me feel nuts. Last week was one of them and it was good to have a day of silence to regroup.
1 tag
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 62
Day 62: Goofed off all day. It meant that I stayed an hour late after work to get stuff done, but I goofed off with my work buddies most of the day. I really needed that. We work so hard that a day of just talking and laughing and forgetting what we’re there to do was a really needed event.
1 tag
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 61
Day 61: I bumped into a friend just as I was going out to get dinner. So I randomly had dinner with a friend, which is wonderful. It feels like that kind of serendipity only happens in movies.
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90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 60
Day 60: Remembering how precious life can be. I realized that I forgot to post my joy from Monday, so this one is coming late though it was experienced right on time.
My friend’s father is dying and she is handling it with such grace. You wouldn’t believe how open and aware she is even under unimaginable pressure. It’s as if in the midst of suffering she is full of gratitude for...
2 tags
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 59
Day 59: I ate pizza for breakfast. I thoroughly enjoyed it too!
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90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 58
Day 58: I stopped to take a breath. I literally did. I stopped in the middle of walking out of work and asked myself what joy I had today. Although I could think of little joyful things about the day, things that I was grateful for, they were passive. They were the joys that had happened to me while I went about my regular life. So I stood a minute, took a deep breath, and remembered that I was...
3 tags
“I don’t deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don’t deserve that...”
– Jack Benny (via simko)
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90 Days, 90 Joys: Days 51-57
Day 51: I lit some fall-scented candles in the morning when I was writing and could still smell the scent when I came home from work. I love fall. It’s my favorite season.
Day 52: Birds circling in the sunset. I stood for maybe five minutes and watched a flock of birds float in the shifting current of the wind, seemingly going nowhere, just flying together in the dying sunlight.
...
September 2011
22 posts
1 tag
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 50
Day 50: I listened to my horoscope. It said, “Stoke your sensual fires by getting a bikini wax and a massage.” Uh, no to the bikini wax but the massage is booked!
1 tag
“We are what we think. All that we are arises from our thoughts. With our...”
– Buddha (via nirvikalpa)
1 tag
My Oversharing Problem
Okay, so. Remember that thing that I didn’t want to tell my husband? Specifically what I did was mention our sex life in an article I wrote and sent it out to a national magazine before checking with him that it was okay.
Ouch.
And the reason that I’ve been waiting to tell him I did that is because I wanted him to read the article first (printed out from our computer in the privacy...
1 tag
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 49
Day 49: I felt grouchy so I took a nap. I’m not usually good with that level of self-care. Normally grouchy means I need to woman-up and push through it, while napping is reserved for sick days. But I did it and feel much better. Totally ready to share my toys now.
1 tag
90 Days, 90 Joys: Day 48
Day 48: I bumped into a friend whom I hadn’t seen in months. Moments of serendipity are awesome, especially when they are followed by hugs.