My husband says we need to decide what we want to be before we decide where we want to go. I agree, even though that seems counter intuitive to my decision-making process. I know I can move somewhere in two years if I start planning now. I don’t know if I can get my ideal job in two years if I start planning now. I like the idea of deciding what I want to be first, though.

My husband says that we need to decide what we want to be and where we want to go separately and then compare our plans. He wants to first consider a life uncompromised by me, then tailor that plan to fit me in. Once I’ve decided what I want without him, I will want what I want and won’t want to compromise to fit him in.

He wants to brainstorm separately then decide together. I want to brainstorm together and decide together.

BUT, I made my individual plan and decided to consider him anyway.

NOW, he has not made his individual plan and thinks that it’s because his plan will be more difficult to implement than my plan (although he hasn’t heard my plan yet, he’s just guessing).

I think he likes to procrastinate on big decisions, which is why we should make them together.