RIP Non-Boyfriend
Photo reblogged from a great site - The Art of Manliness!
Every girl had one, right? That friend you had in high school who you’d never date because he felt like your brother but it was always okay to cuddle him anyway. Yeah, I miss that.
My non-boyfriend is married now with two kids so snuggling him is definitely not an option. Plus he lives miles and miles away. Plus I think he got sick of The Fisherman’s Wife, The Accountant’s Wife, and me cuddling up to him like he was a house cat.
But!
But.
I miss that. And I only really thought of it because I now know a guy like that. Nice guy. Would never ever be attracted to him, and it appears that most women feel that way about him. Yet, he’s a really good non-boyfriend kind of guy. He should be gay but he’s not. Just nice and a good listener and doesn’t mind hanging out with women.
I find sometimes I want to lean on him. Or ask him to carry things for me. Or try to set him up with women who might like that non-boyfriend type despite his utterly sweet blandness.
But …
I can’t. Not because my husband would mind all that much because I don’t think he would. It’s that I’m married now and when I had a non-boyfriend I wasn’t. I could hug another man or take advantage of his kindness because … well … the non-boyfriend was a sort of substitute for a boyfriend. He did the boyfriend things without asking for a bj. And he allowed himself to be treated that way because it was the only female attention he got.
But,
Now we’re grown-ups and having a non-boyfriend is not only manipulative but also takes needed attention away from the marriage. Really, if my husband isn’t willing to cuddle me without expecting a bj then that needs to be talked out. Ugh. Double ugh. That was the whole point of having a non-boyfriend in the first place. Right? Luckily my husband is a pretty good non-boyfriend, too, for the most part. But it’s always nice to have a spare.
But, again …
We’re grown-ups now. Secret Thirty-Eight, Revealed. Having a non-boyfriend, even a gay one if I could find one of those, isn’t really an option. RIP non-boyfriend. Know that you were well loved, just not sexually.
