When we are happy we don’t hurt others.

My husband was watching the Black Power Mixtape this week while I was getting ready for work and I caught that line from the voiceover just as I was walking out the door. I’ve been thinking about that ever since.

Maybe happiness doesn’t mean being positive and sneezing rainbows every day. In fact, recently, I’ve been thinking that happiness is accepting every part of myself, being accountable for my behavior, not holding onto shame, making sure I apologize when I need to. Tough stuff but the shift really is bringing forward a deeper sense of happiness.

I’ve been doing those To Do lists. Things get carried over each week, and it feels fine. I haven’t been feeling the stress that I normally do about not having enough time to get everything done. I get the important things checked off the list—both changing my bank and taking a yoga class. Other things will happen later—taking a meditation class and scheduling an orthodontist appointment. Little by little, I’m getting there. Peace. Calm. Balanced.

People will feel angry at me. People will feel hurt by me. People will believe that I should drive faster on the freeway, slower on the freeway, that I should listen better, that I should speak up more. People will think that I am embarrassing, that I’m too shy, that I’m not social enough, that I don’t return emails fast enough. As my husband likes to remind me, Haters gonna hate. But that has nothing to do with me as long as my happiness starts from a quiet place, when it comes from deep within. When I’m happy, I don’t hurt people, not intentionally.

And also according to my husband, the Black Power Mixtape was one of the best movies of the year. Watching it later today to see this amazing quote fall into context. I’ll be sure to get the specific quote and who said it when I do.

This week’s joys:

Margin Call—another terrific movie.

Gold Glitter nail polish—so subtle that it still looks great even when it chips!

Have you read The Hunger Games yet? Still living in the joy of reading that trilogy.

My husband—after Christmas especially, I’ve been reminded how incredibly lucky I am that he’s mine.

Taking a shower until the water runs cold—sorry, planet, but I love long showers.

The Fisherman’s Wife’s son—almost his 1-year birthday and just seeing his face makes me happy.

Skinny Cow ice cream—when I don’t eat two at a time.

Sunshine—L.A. drives me nuts but January weather can’t be beat.

Time to blog—Making time. It feels good.